So, after using this site for a while, then being absent for a while, I have had time to search for greener pastures.  And I found them.  If you would like to continue reading my stories then come on over to

http://casilinda.blogspot.com/

There will be pictures. :)

See you!

When I first started working as a preschool teacher at my current job.  I wasn't quite sure what to expect.  In the interview I got such a great feeling from the director of the school that I just got sold on the idea and thought, "This sounds like a happy place to work."   During my training my coworkers told me that we should try to not use the word, "No."  Ummm.  What? 

I thought it was kind of silly and ridiculous to never say "No."  I figured that I would find a bunch of spoiled and out of control kids in the class.  I had watched Nanny 911 enough to know that you gotta be powerful and strong with children.  Kids who are just a little bit afraid of you are good kids. 

I found out that I had a lot to learn.  Its not so much about control and punishment, but rather thinking in a positive way versus looking for what's wrong all the time.  In my school, rather than say "Don't pick your nose."  I say, "What do you plan to do with that booger after you pull it out of your nose?"..."Yeah maybe you should get a tissue."  Its just a different way of thinking.  The kids have a lot of responsibility to think for themselves and do what is right. 

I worry that too many adults treat kids like they are "wrong" and scold them and take away their pride and confidence.  There is really no need to shame a child when they make a mistake or do something that is not good for them and others.  It takes more effort, but if you just talk to them and try to explain the "whys" of what we do as people, it is so much better. 

But you know, it is not easy to break old habits.  I still often hear myself saying "No" to kids when they startle me and do something totally unexpected. When that happens I try to add a "please" to then end of the sentence.  For example, "Don't eat that Lego!...please."  Then afterwards we talk about how if we eat all of the legos then there won't be any left to play with.  Oh, and it will probably hurt to poop them.  Kids can relate to these ideas. 

It has really made a big difference in my life to try and think in a positive way.  Rather than get all pissed when someone bumps into me as they speed past me on the street, I just figure that maybe they are in a hurry to get somewhere.  I know it sounds silly and basic, but before I would really get annoyed by these little things.  I could make lists of all of the things that "people" do that pisses me off.  But why did I feel this way?  Its such a waste of energy. 

So I am still working on thinking in a more positive way.  It really is a lot of work but its worth it. 

Notice how I didn't call this entry "Christmas 2008." Yeah thats because Christmas in Japan is pretty disappointing. Of course that is to be expected. It is not a Christian country. However that did not stop this country from adopting the holiday...well pieces of it. Here are some funny Christmas traditions in Japan:
- People eat KFC. I am not sure why exactly but somehow it became a local tradition.
- Lots of young women wear sexy Santa costumes. I was looking for a Santa costume for our school and at the shop about 90% of the costumes on display were for women rather than men. ha ha
- Department stores and shopping malls still have a lot of decorations and piped in carols.
- Guys buy Christmas cakes for their girlfriends. A small cake about the size of stack of pancakes can cost around $30.
- Kids get presents next to their pillow.
and finally I have saved the worst for last...
- Couples have a date then end the night in a love hotel

So, Christmas is not my favorite thing here. However New Years is the real event in Japan. But you already knew that didn't you?

On New Years eve my friends and I planned to go clubbing in Tokyo until the morning train. We also put in some time to eat Soba noodles before midnight. The noodles are long and they symbolize our hopes for a long life. I asked my Japanese boyfriend if I could make a wish while eating the soba. He said no.

As sometimes happens, the clubbing plans didn't go as expected. The first place we went was really empty. The next place cost $40 to get in and was INSANELY crowded and crappy.

(My advice: Never never never go to a club called Vuenos in Shibuya. Its a bad, overpriced, dirty, crowded, hell-hole full of the most annoying people you would never want to meet. They also are crooks because after being inside for less than 5 minutes we tried to leave and return our drink vouchers but they wouldn't give us our money back. Vuenos in Shibuya sucks. Maybe if I put there name in here enough my entry will show up on Google searches and potential customers will be diverted. I am vengeful sometimes. Vuenos.)

So rather than blow all our money on cover charges all night we decided to go to a fun little pub called the Hub. Its a nice place. Everytime I have gone there I have met nice people and had fun. This night was no exception. We met a group of French tourists who spoke to us in heavily accented English about when and where to go in France on vacation. Then we met a really clever and funny Norwegian guy who we talked to until the wee hours when trains were running again.

So we hopped a train back to Yokohama to watch the first sunrise of the year. Finally, my boyfriend told me that I could make a wish when I saw the first sunrise. I smiled and he asked me what I wanted to wish for. When I told him I wish for 10 more wishes he seemed confused. I think I ruined the moment. There is a lovely park near Motomachi that offered the perfect view. Like many perfect and charming Japanese events, you are not the only one who knows about it. So I shared this romantic and peaceful moment with my boyfriend...and about 150 strangers.

The next day, January 1st is a very important family day in Japan. Many relatives get together and eat traditional foods and make their first visit of the year to their local shrine. I spent the day with my adoptive Japanese relatives, Seiko's family. When I showed up at the train station Seiko and her 3 year old niece Wakana greeted me. I said to Wakana "Akemashite omedeto gozaimasu." (Which means Happy New Year. I had been practicing it in the train the whole way there.) Then she just smiled and said it back to me. Yay, it worked!

At Seiko's house we ate soup made with Mochi(sticky pounded rice), radish, onions, salmon, tonyaku (I don't know how to explain this), tofu, carrots, and fish cake. It is so warm and yummy. It is like Japanese soul food. I ate a total of like 6 bowls over two days. There is also a sweet soup made with sweet beans and mochi that I really enjoy. Seiko told me that over these 3 days they will eat sweet and salty food that was prepared in advance so that the mom can take a break from cooking.

I also joined them on a visit to their religious center. It is not really shrine or temple. It is the place where practicing Buddists go for services. I am not sure what the English name would be. It was a really cool experience. Seiko's mom is in the religion of Soka Gakkai. It is the biggest religion in Japan.

The service was so interesting. Here is a play-by-play:
When we entered the building there were about 20 people wearing suit jackets greeting us and directing us where to go. We first took off our shoes and then put them in these rows and rows of shelves. Each area had a little logo/picture so you can remember where your shoes are afterwards. After this we went to a greeter and gave him the tickets with our names that Seiko's mom had given us. He gave us a pretty card that says some stuff I can't understand and has a picture of water lilies on it.

We walked into the room/church for the service and sat on the floor. There were tatami mats on the floor and a few chairs along the walls for the elderly. The services started with a lot of chanting. "namio ho re ge kyo namio ho re ge kyo namio ho re ge kyo..." The sounds of so many people chanting was quite moving. It really made me just stop thinking for a second and just listen. I felt really calm. Then about 5 different lectors talked for a few minutes each. Then another short chanting session. Then...it was over. It lasted 15 minutes!

It was clearly time to go because now about 100 different people started directing traffic and telling us where to stand, walk, and go. We got our shoes and filed along with the waves of people out the door to the car park where even more staff were directing cars. Whew! It was such a whirlwind.

I am not sure how many people were in the church. Its hard to tell because you can fit a lot of people in a room when they sit on the floor. But once we started leaving it became apparent that there were A LOT of people in there.

It gave me so much to think about. I guess there are many more ways to pray than I had considered.

Happy New Year!

Thursday morning I was running late. (As usual) I decided to get on the first car of the train. It is the one that lets me off closest to the ticket gates so I can make a quicker transfer at the station. It is also the most crowded car. It doesn't really bother me anymore to be on a crowded train. I only get upset if my lunch gets smashed.

This day was another packed day. I was pressed on on all sides and I could not move an inch. My arm was up holding on to the bar for balance. My mind was just wandering like it usually does, when I realized that something was really pressing against my backside. I assumed it was a briefcase or somekind of object. Then I realized that it was warm. I could feel it very distinctly then I would stop feeling it and think that it had just been my imagination. But it came to a point where I could feel fingers. It became shockingly apparent that the large man behind me was touching me. I kind of froze. I tried to turn my body and inch away from him. But the train was so packed that I couldn't move without jostling all of the people around me. I was getting some sideways glances from those people who clearly felt annoyed that the foreigner was bumping into them.

My mind was a mess. I actually started feeling ashamed and embarassed. Like it was somehow my fault. I felt like I had a choice to make a big scene and call out the man for what he was or do nothing. And I was afraid so I did nothing.

As the train was pulling into the last station the man grabbed me and was pressing himself against me strongly. He was breathing hard in my ear. I was pulling the bar really hard to try and get away from him, but I couldn't move at all. It was awful.

When the doors opened at the station I didn't even look back. I just ran out on to the busy platform and ducked in front of people as I made my way to the front of the pack. I made my transfer and got to work. When I walked in the door of work one of my students ran up to me and started telling me a funny story. I realized that I didn't want to let what happened ruin my mood for the whole day so I just pushed it back.

Throughout the day I would think of it then just push it back again. By the end of the day it felt like it had just been a dream that never happened. My emotions wouldn't even properly register. I would almost laugh thinking about it.

But I have good friends at work so I decided to tell them about it. They were very sympathetic which I needed. And they were also angry which I didn't realize I needed but I did. There is really nothing I can do in the way of pressing charges since I don't know who did it. So I have to focus on what I CAN do. I need to realize that what happened has nothing at all to do with ME. It is just a messed up person who would have done the same thing to any other person who was standing there at the time. I was just unlucky enough to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. I also need to make a plan to protect myself. I need to have an automatic response that I do if this ever happens again. Since my brain is unreliable in these situations I need to have something that I don't think about but I just DO.

I had heard about train perverts a long time ago. It is real problem in Japan. There are cars on morning trains for only women. THIS is supposed to be enough preventative measure. I thought that these perverts were silly fools who would never have the guts to try their crap on someone like me. I figured if they did I would relish in calling them out for what they are. I would make them regret what they did and humiliate them in the process. I thought that Japanese women were weak for putting up with this in their society.

I have a lot more sympathy for these women now. It is not easy to defend yourself in these humiliating circumstances. These guys have a plan when they are doing this. They are calculating, horrible, disgusting people.

I was talking to my female friend about this last night. We came to the conclusion that it is really hard to defend yourself when these bad things happen. But it is much easier to stand up for your friends. I think women need to work hard to take care of each other. We need to support and protect one another because we never know when we will be needing suppport and protection.

Remember me? Sorry it has been a while since I posted. I don't have a good reason. Maybe facebook is taking over my computer.

Not to get too girly-girly on you all, but I wanted to share some funny things I have learned about dating in Japan. I feel like I have been here long enough that the brainwashing is starting to take effect and I have to remind myself that "I am not like this." and "This is not how I like to live my life." But, in the strife to fit in I have fallen into some funny habits myself.

My first year in Japan I felt utterly at a loss when trying to meet guys. I felt that Japanese men found me too aggressive and outspoken so they probably would never approach me. And they didn't. One Canadian girl told me to not even bother with Japanese men and just go for the Latinos. I also figured that every foreign guy was too busy being worshipped by Japanese women to give a try to a girl like me who will make them prove themselves before I fall all over them. I was (partially) wrong and have found that I just didn't understand the culture.

It started last winter. I decided that I didn't want to wait around anymore so I was just going to be outgoing and try. I call it the "I don't know how to play dating games so I won't" approach. Its a long name. Maybe I could shorten it to IDKHTPDGSIW. Eh...still too long.

Since then I have met and dated quite a few Japanese and foreign men.

From what I can gather from female Japanese friends of mine a typical date in this country goes something like this:
The girl asks the guy out.
She probably met him through a friend.
They have dinner at some swanky place.
He pays.
Conversation is modest and polite but can include topics of salary, blood type, and what prefecture they are each from.
A short walk around someplace nice is typical. He might walk in front of her. They don't hold hands.
A bow and small wave at the train station ends the night.
He may not call or email her again until the next Friday when they arrange for another meeting.

This can carry on for weeks and months. He is working overtime nearly every day of the week. He can't really meet her afterwork. Many weekends they can't meet because one or the other has to attend a mandatory drinking party with their coworkers.

Learning this I was very hesitant to even try dating Japanese men. Some of my friends have had success and met great Japanese guys. So I don't want to make a sweeping statement saying that all Japanese men are the same. Of course they aren't. But the guys I have met have fallen into two categories: 1. They think I am super cool because I am American and want to show me off around town and have loud conversations with me in English in public places. 2. They think I am easy because American girls in TV shows and movies are. They try to take me to a hotel on the first date.

I did find that Japanese guys need a lot more encouraging than foreign men. Its not enough to smile at them, or wave, or motion towards your empty glass, or hold up your left hand and gesture wildly at your bare ring finger. No, you have to talk to them and somewhere in the conversation clearly state that you like them and want to hang out with them. Clearly. Just use those exact words if nothing else. Otherwise you will be playing a long game of trying to figure each other out that will fizzle into frustration and confusion.

The Japanese dates I have been on haven't ALL been bad. (But those stories are less interesting so I won't share them.)
I had one date with a man who really liked Jazz and Blues but didn't understand all of the lyrics. His English wasn't so great. So he took me to a jazz/blues bar and asked me what each song was saying. I had to really simplify everything so basically I spent the whole night saying, "His girlfriend left him. He is sad. Really sad. Sometimes when he is sad he feels bad..."
Once a guy asked me if I had ever seen a cactus and are they really dangerous. He probably also wondered if I could get him John Wayne's autograph.
One guy I was dating for a couple of months said I seemed to be moving too fast because I called him on his birthday. We had been out that Saturday and he usually called me to make plans on Thursday, but I jumped the gun by calling him on a Monday. I think I missed something in the translation there.
I was shocked once when a man walked in front of me during our post-dinner stroll. I asked if he was in a hurry to get somewhere. He just said no. I see this all the time with other couples but I was still blown away when it happened to ME.
In a club one night a man walked up to me and said point blank, "I like big busts." (I am not busty at all by western standards BTW) But he really thought that this was an appropriate pick up line.

What really bothers me is the lack of affection and also not treating me like a "lady." It feels really cold. But then there is the other extreme where a guy is all hands-y. ugh. There is not much hand holding here. Also, in Japan it is not common for people to kiss in public. It bothers me. I don't want a big sloppy one but a nice goodnight kiss would be welcomed. What's a girl gotta do?

Date other guys.

So I have dated other types and nationalities of men with mixed success. There are some good guys out there. After my experience with the Japanese guys I am always really thrilled to have a date pull out my chair, open the door for me, leave me sweet little messages on my phone, and do all the dating stuff that I am used to. I nearly married a man recently who told me over a bottle of wine that he can speak 10 languages, likes cats, talks to his mom every week, and has two degrees in Engineering and Ecology. (I'm seeing him again on Saturday.)

However, being a foreigner makes it complicated. I am not looking for my husband and I am not looking for a fling. I am in this gray area where I would like to date you and hang out with you but eventually...I'm gonna leave. I don't know if I will find someone serious who will fit into my plans or who I would change my plans for. But there are always questions and risks when you start new relationships. You can let them stop you. You can see them as obstacles. Or you can just enjoy your life and all of the challenges and adventures it brings.

If a foreign woman were to ask me for advice I would tell her to be confident and just have fun getting to know new people. Being from another country is also an easy coversation starter. There are a few questions that can break the ice easily like, "Where are you from?" "How long have you been in Japan?" and "Do you like natto?"
AND
Don't lose yourself. I have been guilty of letting a man pay for everything all night even though its not really the western way to do things. I have also been guilty of having whole conversations about blood type. So lame, I know. I am more shy and standoff-ish than I was before and I think this is directly related to being in Japan for this long.
But...the first step is admitting, right?

I think the best way to end this is by quoting the great Smokey Robinson, "My mama told me...you better shop around."

So, I listen to NPR radio podcasts to keep up to date on my Americana. I like to hear all of the things that are happening over there. Today I was listening to a story about BJD's. That stands for Ball Jointed Dolls. It said that these new dolls from Japan are really popular around the world now. You can special order every detail about their appearance from hair, eyes, skin color, and body type. I thought it sounded interesting so I googled them. Plus, when I was a little girl I loved Barbies and part of me still finds dolls fun.

But...this...is different.

Well, I guess that each doll owner is different. Some people might just find them fun and cute. But...some people have really lost their grip on reality. Maybe these people are lonely. For whatever reason, they have started to treat these dolls like people.

I recently watched the movie, "Lars and the Real Girl" so maybe this whole idea is on the surface of my mind still.

It's just kind of weird and interesting. So if you want to drop your jaw then go to this website and read the photo comments.

http://www.iplehouse.net/board/list.php?board_name=DREAMBOARD11

So I have been thinking about picture taking a lot lately.

In my job we take pictures of the kids all day long. We then use these pictures to update our monthly website, make birthday cards, and newsletters. At the end of the year we make a yearbook with all of our pictures. But really, how many do we need. What THINGS do we need pictures of? Kids faces. Groups doing things and looking happy. Special events. However, managing our pictures has become a real headache. We take about 30 pictures a day...210/week...840/month...it adds up. Who has time to look through all of these pictures? We store them on CDs when the hard drive gets too full. I think that once the pictures get put on a CD no one will ever look at them again. We don't have the time.

When I go out with my friends we like to take pictures of ourselves being dressed up and having fun. It is nice to look at these pictures and remember the good time we had. But...I have a lot of pictures of myself now, on facebook, in a club/bar, holding a drink. From the looks of it, I go out drinking a lot. Thats not entirely true. I just take pictures a lot when I go out.

When I go to some tourist spot, I like to look at everything without thinking about taking pictures. When I think of getting my picture taken standing in front of something then I suddenly feel like I am not "in the moment." Its like a big perspective shift. If I take a picture of a famous "thing" like a temple or monument or mountain without me in the frame then I feel like, "Hmmm, I think I can buy a postcard of the this shot that is better." And really really, so many people take these kinds of pictures. I went to a famous shrine in Nikko this last weekend and I saw countless people taking the same shot. It was so crowded to take this photo that people actually waited and had to take turns standing in the best spot. They waited (looking at other things, the people around them, their feet) then when it was their turn they took the shot and then just walked off like, "Ok thats done." They didn't even take the time to stand and LOOK with their own eyes at what was in front of them.

I didn't take many pictures in Nikko. My friend took a lot. On the train ride on the way back I was looking through my few shots and I felt a little bummed that I didn't have more to remember my trip by. I can go online and google "Nikko" anytime to re-visit the images of what I saw, but its not the same. hmmm.

On my computer now I have about 400 pictures that I have taken and saved since I bought my computer in November. I almost never go through them.

I am not sure whats the best solution. I think that our decendents will have many pictures of our generation. I guess I should just keep taking pictures while I can and worry about how to store/save/manage them later.

I had a meeting with one of my moms last week. She is a great lady. She is such a thoughtful, kind and caring person. Her daughter is a sweet little 5 year old girl.

They are Japanese but a couple of years ago they lived in the US. When they were there, the little girl was enrolled in a typical American preschool. The mom had so many insights into the cultural differences between America and Japan from this experience. We had fun talking about them, but it was also so educational for me.

She told of a time when she was picking up her daughter at school. She saw a big group of children dancing in one part of the classroom while her daughter played with a puzzle by herself in another area. The mom scolded her daughter and told her that she should join her peers. The teacher then explained to the mom that it was ok if the girl didn't want to join. If she preferred to do a puzzle than that is fine.

It was the moms first experience with the American concept of Individuality. She was really impressed. Now she tries to allow her daughter to seek what things interest her at her own "pace."

In typical Japanese kindergartens children do the same thing at the same time together. It is much more strict and the value is put on creating harmony in the group. I think that this stems from the Buddist philosophy. "The nail that sticks out will get hammered down." I can see value in this idea, but it is not for me. Of course, I am American.

It really opened my eyes to how mothers at my school might view what we do with the children and how our classroom operates. Basically, we bring one or two main activities into the room each day during our wisely named "Activity Time." We create activities based on our current project or what the children are currently interested in. The children have gotten used to coming over and trying things out. If they like it they might stay for a long time and really focus on it. Or they might do it for about 15 minutes and then decided that they are finished. Or they might watch and decided that its not for them. Since we have many teachers in the room this is fine. They can do anything they want as long as they don't disturb the other students. The kids are really good at this and we rarely need to remind them that they are being too loud or disturbing our progress. So we always have a lot going on in the room at the same time. Its exciting. The kids are happy and learning. But to a Japanese eye it might look like we have a bunch of crazy disrespectful kids creating chaos. I think we need to be sure to communicate to parents the value of raising children who follow their curiosities and are not just learning how to "please the teacher" in school.

Thoughts?

This Saturday some of my girlfriends and I decided to go to Zushi for beach salsa. Zushi is only about 30 mins on the train from Yokohama. There is a "shack" right on the beach called Oasis Latino. And inside you will find actual Latinos. Ha ha. It seemed that a lot of the regulars were from Peru and Dominican Republic.

In true Latino style, the lesson started about 45 minutes late. But it was no biggie because we were just relaxing on the sand drinking Tecates while we waited.

The lesson cost 2,000 yen (about $20.) And instead of it being a salsa lesson it was a samba lesson. We just wanted to have fun, so it didn't matter.

The instructor was this big, tan, caricature of a Latin Dance instructor. He had long, dark, curly hair, very short shorts and a thin white shirt that when he raised it revealed a belly-button piercing with pink and white rhinestones. He could demonstrate both the female and male postures perfectly. I know it sounds crazy, he is not really my type, but I gotta say, he was sexy.

He smiled and joked with everyone the whole time. Samba is pretty tough and we were sweating our a$$es off but he kept things fun. He tried and tried to get the Japanese students to move their hips, but...it was pretty comical.

The lesson was a lot of fun and it made me excited to come back and learn more. The only bad thing is...there is no A/C! No fans, no...survival. It was so hot that after the lesson I just wanted to escape and cool off somewhere. And after dancing to a few songs thats exactly what we did.

Next weekend we will go back. We decided that we will go early so we can play at the beach all day before the lesson. I am excited!

As you know, I work in the tallest building in Japan. There are 70 floors in all. My school is on the 13th. Lucky 13. Since we are a school we need to regularly practice emergency drills. We do an earthquake drill where we hide under tables. We do a stranger drill where we hide behind cubbies. And this week we did a fire drill where we had to evacuate the building. In an actual fire you cannot use elevators (of course) so we have to walk down the stairs. 13 flights of stairs with very young children. It is not fun. We have a good routine so we are safe and it only takes us about 15 minutes to get to the 1st floor. But...its bizarre.

So the next time you think about what a pain fire drill are in schools, just think, atleast there aren't 13 flights of stairs involved.

I just got home from a weekend in Seoul. My friends Eiko and Seiko and I decided that we wanted to take a trip together this summer. Korea is really close. The flight is only about an hour and half. Plus, I have been really interested in going there for a while. Especially since I have some Korean students at my school. So we decided to go there.

We booked kind of late so we ended up with this really crazy flight schedule. We left Tokyo at 5 am on Saturday and coming back left Seoul at 2 am Monday morning. Yeah, kind nutty.

The really funny thing was...I was with a Japanese tour group. I was the only non-Japanese there. So all of the instructions and information was in Japanese. The good part, I could see over everyones head. But I am sure a lot of folks were a bit suprised to see me there.

When we got to our hotel it was pouring rain! And it rained all weekend. In between the rainy spells there was wet heat. The weather was not on our side.

Like a dummy, I had brought Crocs to wear. In the rain, those things are so slippery. After nearly breaking my neck for the 20th time I ran into a converse store and bought me a pair of sneakers. whew.

So now we were set to go. First things first. Lets eat! We went to a noodle shop that was recommended in Seiko's travel book. Holy garlic! That food was so spicy and garlic-y. It was yummy but hit pretty hard on our empty stomachs.

After that we walked all around an area called Myeong Dong. It is a shopping street that caters to mostly...Japanese tourists. I was shocked to hear so much Japanese. Some of the people didn't speak English so I had to ask questions in Japanese. In this area they mostly sell clothes, shoes, and cosmetics. Seiko and Eiko were all excited about this stuff called BB Cream. I guess it is sunblock, moisturizer and foundation all-in-one. whoop-dee-doo.

After lots and lots of shopping we met Eiko's high school friend who now lives in Seoul. She was a really nice girl named Yuko. She taught us a lot and took us to an amazing restaurant. The food was so delicious and spicy. If you have never had kimchee, then you totally need to find some and try it out. It is addictive.

That night we walked around a night market and found nice lady who sold us A LOT of Korean sea weed. It is totally worth it though. That stuff is amazing. It is crunchy and salty and inspite of this, really healthy for you.

The next morning we went to a porridge place for breakfast. I had porridge with beef and mushrooms and for dessert we had a soup made from sweet beans and mochi.

After that we went to the Palace Gyeongbukgung. The history of it is a little sad. In 1592 it was burnt down by Japanese invaders. In 1895 Queen Min was killed in her bedroom by a Japanese assassins who then burnt her body. During Japanese colonial rule most of it was destroyed and the Japanese Governor General's office was placed inside of it to upset its flow of chi. I was not all that suprised to see fire extinguishers all over the place. But I was really beautiful. I was so happy to stroll around taking pictures. My counterparts had mostly been interested in shopping so this part was more my thing. They are girly girls so they wore ridiculous shoes. They kept sitting down and waiting for me. I felt a little bad but hey I smiled and played along while visiting about 10 cosmetics shops. By the end of the trip my friend Eiko's feet were covered with band-aids. She hobbled like a crippled person. I told her she should just buy some flip flops so she could be comfortable. But nooo. In Japan people only wear flip flops to the beach. Even though I saw a lot of Korean girls wearing flip flops and still looking cute, Eiko would not budge. I guess she thought it was cuter to limp around with bleeding feet. ugh.

The next place we went to was an area called Insagong. It is a traditional style street with many shops that sell souvenirs and Korean Antiques. We had tea when the rain got too heavy at a really nice shop. I had iced date tea. It was really yummy.

After this our plan was for me to go to the War Memorial museum and Seiko and Eiko to go to a beauty spa for a body scrub. Well, I got sidetracked and ran short of time. Then I got a little lost, so I missed the museum. When we met up, they showed me pictures. They got to wear traditional Korean clothes! And there was no body scrub so they soaked in hot tubs filled with green tea, Korean herbs, and natural minerals. grrr. I was jealous.

For dinner that night we had amazing Korean barbeque. They placed hot coals right in the middle of the table and cooked the meat in front of us. Again, we ate a lot of spicy kimchee. The waitress was a little confused and wasn't sure whether she should speak English or Japanese. ha ha.

When we finished eating we had about 2 hours until we needed to meet our tour group in the hotel. So we walked around a bit then spotted a nice cafe. Inside of the cafe there is unlimited coffee and bread, books, magazines, a photo booth, and Dr. Fish. We each got some drinks then settled in. I was looking over at the Dr. Fish. It turns out, they are small fish that are good at eating the dead skin off of your feet. I thought, ok I can try that. Plus it was only like 2 dollars. So I paid my money, washed my feet, then went to the edge of the pool. As I started lowering my foot into the water...every fish dashed over to me. Their hungry mouths opened and shut as they looked up at me with big eyes. Ahhh! I don't know what I expected. But...you could really feel them all over your feet. It was awful. It was like cockroaches crawling all over you. In this quiet cafe, I was screaming and shrieking. I tried many times but my fear took hold and I had to give up. I couldn't even hold my foot in for 3 seconds.

The Korean attendant was totally not amused. He just looked at me with a blank face. When I quit he just shrugged and grabbed the disinfectant to spray my feet. ugh.

Finally, we went back to the hotel and met our group to fly back to Japan.

Korea was really interesting. It was nice to get away from Japan for a bit. Korean food was great! The people were much more outgoing. I never felt like I was not being polite enough or that I was being too loud. People held hands as they walked down the streets and hummed songs to themselves in the train station. Taxi drivers joked with us. Everything was a bit more "real" than Japan. But also, the streets were a bit uneven and littered. Sometimes service was spotty. There are pros and cons. Overall, I was really excited and happy the whole time. I just loved watching people and eating every new food I could get my hands on.

Since it was such a short time, I didn't get to see everything I wanted to. I think I will go back soon for another visit. I am also thinking about trying a year of English teaching there in the future.

Hooray Korea!

Yeah, its pretty gross but I hadn't been to the dentist since I moved here. eww. So yesterday, I finally went. I found a clinic with an English speaking doctor and dentist! It is so great. They can also refer you to English speaking specialist-type doctors. I got a referral to a dermatologist.

The dentist was a really gentle and kind Japanese woman. She took her time and talked me through everything. I was pretty scared though. Someone had once told me that in Japan they don't give out pain killers and numbing things so easily. You have to pretty much beg to get them. Also, the dental tools on the tray looked really old fashioned and...violent. When she started cleaning it was more painful than I remember it being back home, but I was determined to tough it out. I started doing multiplication tables in my head, 3, 6, 9, 12, 15...at some points when it was really bad I got up into the 300s. But after everything, she said that I didn't have any cavities. woohoo! She said that my teeth are healthy and normal. So I didn't have to worry about the whole painkillers thing. I asked her if I could have some flouride. She paused awkwardly then was like, "Sure!" She had to teach the dental hygienist how to do the flouride treatment. I guess it is not so common here. They seemed all excited to be doing it and I heard them say "sugoi!" so many times. (wow!)

After everything, I was worried how much it would cost me. The final bill was about 60 dollars. Without insurance! Amazing. Why is healthcare so expensive in America?

After that I was off to the dermatologist. While I was there I also showed him a wart I had on my hand. He said, "Thats easy. We will burn it." He brought out the scary fogging witch's brew. I said, "Is it going to hurt." He said, "probably." He didn't give me much warning before he put the q-tip on my hand. AHHHH! It hurt so bad. I was yelling "ouch! ouch!" and when that didn't get a response "itai! itai!" He just held onto my hand by the wrist and kept holding the q-tip on the spot. Afterwards, I said I was sorry for being a baby but it DID really hurt. He and the nurse just laughed.

When you get that done in America do they numb the spot first? Or am I really just the biggest baby ever?

For about an hour afterwards, my hand was throbbing. Even today it still hurts a little. waaaa.

But another great thing, my bill was only about 10 dollars. (with insurance)

So, I had a really fun birthday that stretched on over two weekends! woohoo! The day before my birthday we had a Fathers' Day event at my school. The kids came with ONLY their dads and we all made kites together and then took them down to the park and flew them. When the kids first arrived that morning, one little girl gave me a big card she had made. Then she put a paper tiara on my head that said "Happy Birthday" and another boy gave me a card he was so excited about that he opened it for me. ha ha.

That night, I met some friends for dinner at a Mexican restaurant and then 3 hours of Karaoke. After that some more friends joined our group and we went clubbing all night. It was really fun. But strange. I took a chinese vitamin drink that is supposed to make you not get a hangover. But it resulted in the alcohol having to affect on me AT ALL. hmmm. So, I unwisely decided to drink MORE and sure enough...I got red faced. But it was ok because by that time the morning trains were starting. Seiko had invited me to stay with her and spend the next day with her family. So we took the train WAY OUT to her house in Atsugi. By the time we got in the door it was about 9AM. I slept for about 3 hours, before I was woken up by the sounds of her niece and nephew playing. So we got ready then went downstairs to join them. I was so tired. But they are so cute. For dinner that night we had yaki-nikku. It is when you have a hot plate on the table and you cook thin strips of meat as you are eating. It is yummy and fun.

Before dinner Seiko asked me how to use the chili powder my parents had given her family. I started explaining then just decided to go ahead and make some chili sauce for them. After I made it, she asked, "How do you eat it?" I said its really good with tortillas. Then... I made some tortillas. She tricked me. ha ha. But at the dinner table they all seemed to really like it. They ate all of the sauce and tortillas. Then they were trying it on EVERYTHING. I think I saw her mom make a burrito with Yaki-nikku meat, pasta salad and chili. I said that she is just like my dad, since he puts chili on everything too.

After dinner her family brought out a really pretty cake and presents for me. They are so great! Her sister gave me a manicure set. Her sister-in-law gave me a little purse that she had sewn herself and some lavender from her garden! She is such a super mom. Then her mom gave me an Earthquake Emergency kit! It has some instant type food, water, a wind-up type radio with flashlight and more. Its such a thoughtful gift. When I first moved here they were really concerned with teaching me what to do in an emergency. They always made sure to have a plan on where I should meet them. Its really nice to have that support.

After our goodbyes, I was back on the train headed to Yokohama, but...my weekend wasn't over. I had made a date with a guy I met. So FINALLY after that I was home and sleeping in my own bed.

All week I was tired. Then just this last Friday, we finally were able to have my birthday party for work. I requested a karaoke party. It was so much fun. We sang for two hours. And...another cake! Well, a pie actually, but yay!

So, it was quite shocking to see the news a few weeks ago about the stabbings in Akihabara. JUST after I had written about it. Actually, that Sunday night I was walking through Yokohama station with my friend Mamiko and they were handing out free newspapers to all of the people. Everyone was standing around reading them and nervously talking to one another. Mamiko got one, and I asked, "Whats going on?" She read it to me and we were both so shocked. It basically told the same story that you heard on the news: A man in Akihabara drove a big rental truck onto the closed street running over people. Then when the car got stuck he got out and started stabbing people at random.

It is really sad to hear news like this. In Japan, where there is very little violence, it is so shocking.

A couple of weekends ago, I went to Akihabara with my friend Leah. It was my first time to explore that area. Akihabara is an interesting part of Tokyo. It is the "Electronics" area that also caters to all the things that a nerd may like.

As we were walking down the main strip we found MANY electronics shops. You can buy ANYTHING there. They had all kinds of computer accessories new/used for any model for any brand and from any year. It is all there. I was excited to see some of the amazing monitors they had for sale. I know, I lame.

The street we were on was closed to traffic for the weekend. It was four lanes with a median and it was filled with people. Well, mostly men. After spending a lot of time in the shopping areas like Shibuya and Shinjuku I always wondered where all the Japanese men were. Well, I found them.

There is a thing in Japan called "cosplay." It is short for costume play. It is pretty much where people like to get dressed up, usually as comic book characters but also as maids, aliens, or anything else they feel like. I saw a 30-ish man wearing a Sailor Moon get-up complete with wig and thigh-high leggings. I also saw about...100 maids.

In Aki-ba there are these places called maid cafes. For about the same that you pay at a regular cafe you can get your food served to you by Japanese girls dressed as "cutesy" maids. We went to a place called Pinafore that is famous because it was once featured in the tv drama "Densha Otoko." The girls of course wore maid costumes that, unexpectedly, were not at all scandelous. They also had little accessories like devil horns or cat ears, little purses, and stuffed animals perched on their shoulders. They spoke in these super squeeky voices and smiled and nodded a lot. Cute cute cute. Ok...too cute...now stop it.

The typical dish at these places is ome-rice. Short for omelete rice. It is rice pilaf covered with an omelete. When the maid brings it to your table you can ask her to draw a picture or write a message with ketchup on your food. I got a monkey drawn on my food that was just insanely cute. Of course I took pictures. I think if you get a cappucino she will write on it with chocolate.

As we were sitting there, we noticed some guys at other tables pulling out these laminated playing cards. They would get all excited and giggly as they looked through their stacks. The cards were on one side a photo of the maid and on the other an anime style drawing of her. They would play against the maids and when they won she gave them more cards. oh...my...gosh...get...a...life. It was a little more than sad.

Of course since Aki-ba is nerd kingdom we found a 5-story tall arcade. On one floor there were some very serious minded "Dance Dance Revolution" players. These guys stood in line to play. When their turn came they first inserted their "frequent player" card then wiped off the soles of their shoes with a wet-nap before they started dancing. They moved at unbelievable speeds. It was cool to watch but sad to think of all of the hours they must have put into the game to get to that skill level.

My friend and I played my favorite game. Taiko! It is a big Japanese style drum. These little circles move across the screen that give you instructions on where to drum, when, and how hard. Then every so often a big red streak comes across the screen and you just hit it as many times as you can, as fast as you can until it is over. It is super fun. Sometimes a purple sweet potato shows up and I just hit the drum a lot until it explodes. I am not sure if this what you are supposed to do. But it really entertains me that there is a sweet potato in the game. I think this game is popular with elementary students. ha ha.

On the top floor of the arcade there is a theater. From outside you can watch a TV that shows what is happening inside. On stage there were about 30 girls in school girl costumes dancing these synchronized cheesy moves. I am not sure even how to explain that style of dancing. It was like the way early generation boy-bands danced but way worse. And the audience was full of middle aged men cheering and imitating the moves with big wide eyes. Yeah...hmmm...

In Japan there is a word "otaku." It kind of means "fanatic." It is used for someone who is very passionate about one particular thing. Usually the word is used for people who are really really into Manga (comic books.) I think in Japan people get really into their hobbies. I have met badminton players that spend over 2 hours every weekday and all weekend playing badminton. I once had a student who loved all things Hawaiian. She wore Hawaiian clothes, cooked Hawaiian food and took Hula lessons constantly. People work hard and play hard in this country. So it seems that naturally there would be a lot of people that are crazy about Manga. Some people think that they are weird and gross so this word can be used very negatively.

I generally like nerds, but actually, there were moments where I was seriously "weirded-out." I guess I would go to Akihabara again if I needed to buy some electronics but I don't think it is a place where I would enjoy just hanging out.

So I think that my love of onsens has been previously well expressed. I adore sitting in a hot bath in the buff. Most of the time I am not bothered by the fact that I am sitting with strangers. There have been a few times when an older woman has stared at me slack jawed and this was upsetting. But for the most part nobody pays any attention to the fact that I am not Japanese (or if they do they hide it well.)

Last weekend my friend Leah, her friends Dom and Anna, and I went north to Gunma to have a nice onsen weekend. The total cost was just over $200 each. This included hotel and meals. The style of hotel we stayed at is a Ryokan. These are traditional style hotels and they have such a homey-feel. When we first arrived we took off our shoes and changed into slippers and...I didn't see my shoes again until we left. The room we stayed in had tatami floors. There was a big low table in the center and some cushion seats around. The hotel mama made us some green tea and sat with us for about 10 minutes welcoming us and telling us all about the hotel and how to use the onsen (hot spring baths.)

After our welcome we changed out of our clothes and into cotton yukatas (like kimonos) and slippers and headed down for our first soak. Along the way we noticed that the Ryokan had free massage chairs. The chairs were set up in this Japanese-style room that was minimally decorated and they faced out a huge window that overlooked a creek, the mountainside and a gorgeous cherry blossom tree in full bloom.

In the room where we disrobed there were really nice baskets to put our things in. As we headed to the shower area, each shower space had a small wooden stool to sit on and small wooden bucket to fill with water for rinsing. There were also all the shower products one could want plus a few extras. These included, shampoo, conditioner, body soap AND hot oil for cleaning your face, an exfoliant, a mud based pack, a loofah, pumice stone, some vegetable based soap and regular bar soap.

After showering we headed out to the outdoor bath. It was really nice. It was made of cedar and it smelled amazing. We sat out there chatting and soaking. Then when we had enough we put on our yukatas and sat in the massage chairs for a while.

When dinner was ready the mama came to our room to collect us. When we entered our private dining room we were amazed and the food. There were too many courses to mention. And it was all delicious. (Well, the baby pickled squid were a little less delicious.)

After dinner, we decided to go for another soak. The mama had told us about another outdoor pool down the path that was "mixed." We hadn't brought any swimsuits but we were curious about it, especially since we were 3 girls and one guy and he had spent a lot of time by himself. So we followed the path down to the mixed pool. And sure enough...it was still nude. Feeling brave we decided to go for it. So I...did. It wasn't sooo bad. There was a lot of forced calm coming from my side. I was trying to act like "Hey its no big deal." While simultaneously feeling worried about everything from how I looked to where I looked. It was an experience but I am not sure I would be able to do it with just anyone. Luckily the friends I was with were nice normal people.

The next morning we were called down to a huge feast for breakfast. It included fish, rice, soup, fruit, veggies, tofu, and more. It was a great way to end our onsen weekend.

Right now, it is my favorite time of year in Japan. The cherry blossoms are blooming. They are so gorgeous. Last week we talked about cherry blossoms a lot with the kids at my school. We learned about the variety of trees there are and how many petals each has as well as the variety of colors that the blossoms can come in. We collected a lot of blossoms at the park one day and put them all together in a basket. They smelled so good! I didn't realize that the blossoms had a fragrance before that.

In Japan, a lot of people like to have hanami parties. Its pretty much a picnic under the cherry blossoms that lasts for hours and includes a LOT of drinking. But I think its great. Some of the more famous parks in Tokyo like Ueno and Yoyogi will get really crowded around peak time. So groups/companies will have people go out early in the morning and set out tarps to reserve their spots. Its a little crazy how crowded it can get. Last year I saw a family that actually brought a TV to hanami. That was just sad.

Since it is a picnic of course there is a lot of food involved. It is not the American snack fare that you might expect though. And I have surprised myself by starting to really like the Japanese snack foods. For those of you that have not been to Japan this might be interesting but for those who have, you might be like "Tessa, whats the big deal?" Nevertheless here is a list of fun foods that I have come across.

- Onigiri: This is a standard grab-and-go food here in Japan. It involves a ball of rice wrapped in crunchy seaweed. Inside of the ball of rice there can be a variety of treats such as tuna, seaweed, salmon eggs, salmon, pickles, fermented soy beans and MORE!

- Dried Squid: I love love love this stuff. Its like jerky made from squid. I am not SURE but I would guess that it is healthier than jerky and it tastes great.

- Nori Potato Chips: There are MANY types of potato chips in Japan. My favorite are ones with little pieces of dried seaweed on them. I have also seen chips in flavors like: hotdog, beef, wasabi, pickled plum, consomme, tomato and more.

- Yaki Soba: This is just fried noddles. But its super good. The noddles are so greasy and mixed up with cabbage, onions, pork, bean sprouts, carrots, and lots of pickled ginger. Oh and if your arteries are feeling up to the challenge you can drizzle mayo on top.

- Yaki Tori: Skewered chicken parts grilled and covered with your choice of sauce or salt. I must say that I think some parts of the chicken would be better left uneaten. But if you want to you can get chicken skin, chicken livers, cartilage (which actually is pretty good with lemon squeezed over it) or chicken reproductive organs. ha ha.

- Mochi: This is rice that has been beaten a lot and thusly turned into a super sticky cake. This cake can then be dropped into soup or grilled or sweetened and filled with beans. Actually there are a lot of things that you can do with mochi. I, of course, like the sweeter options. I had a pink mochi ball wrapped in a leaf once. I was told that I don't need to eat the leaf but rather I can smell it while I eat the mochi to enhance the experience. ok.

- Pocky: This is actually quite simple but I HAVE to mention it because it is everywhere. Pretzel sticks dipped in chocolate or lightly seasoned. I like the chocolate ones. You can get chocolate/banana, chocolate/strawberry, chocolate/caramel, or "Men's" Pocky which is bitter, dark chocolate. I'm such a rebel, I will sometimes get the Men's one even though I am a girl. Whoa! What's next? Burning my bra?

- Senbei: There are about one million varieties of Senbei to buy. They are just rice crackers. I used to think they were nice but now I am just so bored with them. Its just a boring cracker that makes you thirsty.

So you may notice a theme of fish, rice, and seaweed. Yup. Thats Japanese food for ya. I really like a lot of it but I miss the cheesy foods we eat back home as well as the fruity snacks that I had at home and in Ecuador. Now I am hungry.

Today I am in Tokyo with my friend Leah so maybe we will take a walk through Yoyogi and enjoy the cherry blossoms before they are gone.

Thank you for your comments and please send my YOUR blog addresses. And of course feel free to add to the list of snack foods as you like!

Well, judging from how long its been since I last posted, you might have guessed that I took the promotion at work. I am excited about it but its been a lot of work. Right now, I am just sorting out all of the details to get ready for 1st term. But it seems like the simplest things take soooo long. For example, I was making name labels for the kids cubbies last week and it took me 2 hours!

The reason I am taking the position is, the lead teacher from before just got married and she will be switching to part-time so she can...do her wifely duties for her new husband. Its pretty common for women to stop working as soon as they get married even if they aren't planning on having kids anytime soon. Its almost expected.

So, on Thursday, we all had a day off and went to the wedding of my coworker. It was my first time to go to a Japanese wedding so I was really looking forward to it. Well, as it turns out the couple is christian so the wedding ceremony itself wasn't very different from what I am used to. The atmosphere however was very different from what I am used to. But more on that later.

In the church we all filed in to the pews on the bride's side. She had also invited a bunch of the kids from our school to come. They all (wisely) decided to sit up in the balcony. So picture this, there is a normal wedding with relatives and friends on the 1st floor going on. Then up in the balcony there are about 30 very young kids watching. Of course, they shouted out teachers' names and laughed and talked all throughout the ceremony. I would look up and see all of these little heads peering down over the railing. Then when they saw I was looking, they would wave and call my name. There was one little boy who kept saying "I like apples. I like apples." during the wedding. It was pretty funny.

The reception was held in a beautiful pier here in Yokohama called Osanbashi. As we entered there was a place to put your "gift." It is the custom for all wedding guests to give the couple 30,000 yen. That is a little less than $300. So....yeah I wasn't really keen on the idea. Its so impersonal and insanely expensive. So I was a cheap-skate and got them a couples treatment at a spa. I am foreigner so I will use that excuse to get out of silly customs that I don't agree with.

We had assigned seats for the reception and it was easy to find my name on the seating chart as it was one of 3 that wasn't in Kanji. Our table was right next to the bride and groom's. It is also a silly tradition that at weddings coworkers are nearest then friends and at the far end is where family sits. Because that is priority(?)

The meal was beautiful. It was brought out by white-gloved waiters who never let you run out of bread or drinks. Each course was just gorgeous. I was a lame girl and took pictures of my plates with my phone. I will post them soon.

A few weeks before the wedding my friend asked that we do some kind of performance for her reception. At first I was like, "What the heck are you talking about?" Then she said we could do a skit or sing a song or anything. hmmm. This isn't a customary thing for me so I was at a loss. We decided to sing a song in Japanese about a ladybug who falls in love. It is called "Tentoumushi no Samba." (Here is the only example I could find of it but the song doesn't start until about 2 minutes into the clip http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DYVdeUAqHqU )

The song was really fun to learn. We would stay late and practice singing together. I am happy that after my time here I can atleast say that I learned one Japanese song.

So the performance was fun. We wore bug antennae and held up song books that had a picture of a ladybug on them. Then when we finished we opened up our songbooks to the groom which spelled out "KISS HER!" It was all very cute.

The reception was all very beautiful and classy but SO boring. There was no dancing or mingling. We didn't get a chance to talk to the families or anything. We all just sat and ate then when it was over we got up and headed out.

But we didn't leave empty handed. Every guest was given a big gift bag. Inside the gift bag was a cake and a catalogue. The catalogue is full of things like wallets, umbrellas, glassware, kitchen tools, scarves, and more. From the catalogue you can choose a gift for yourself from the bride and groom to be delivered to your house. Crazy huh!

Perhaps I sound ungrateful and judgmental about the whole thing. But I am not. I had a great time and it was really nice to share the special day with my coworker, who I like a lot. It is just hard for me to understand the impersonal and cold-seeming side of Japanese culture sometimes. I want to respect it and just realize that people are different, but...I am not able to just yet.

So after the wedding I went to Tokyo and met my friend. We went to an arcade and played a drumming game then wandered around a skeezy part of Shinjuku called Kabuki-cho just for kicks. http://everything2.com/index.pl?node=Kabukicho

Sorry this is getting so long, but I also have to tell a funny story about what happened on my way home that night. I was standing on the train near the doors and when they opened (not at my stop) I dropped my train pass and it fell between the platform and the train onto the tracks! I got off and stood there shocked for a second. Its such a bizarre rare thing to happen. I found a station man and told him what had happened. As I was showing him my train pass there on the tracks an old drunk man came over. He kept trying to climb down to get it for me! The station man was physically pulling him back and telling him that it was a very dangerous thing to do. When the station man went off the get a reachy thing the crazy man jumped down onto the tracks! He first handed me my train pass then pulled himself back onto the platform. The whole time I was desperately using my limited vocabulary to tell him to stop. (Abunai! Yamete! Onegaishimasu!) It happened so fast. I was thinking "Oh my gosh if he dies getting my train pass. I will never forgive myself." Not a minute after he climbed back up the express passed through, non-stop. It was so scary.

Luckily no one died at the end of my "wedding" blog. ha ha. I'm sorry its been so long since I've last written and now I write something that is much longer than most people's attention spans. Atleast longer than most of my friend's attention spans. Evan. ha ha.

Last weekend I was in Harajuku with my friend Leah. As we were walking around we popped into a few shops. One store we went in totally took me by suprise. It is a clothing store that is a branch of Uniqlo.

As we walked in, a guy gave me a guide. It was a guide on "how" to shop at this store. This is how it is set-up: There are long aisles. In the center of each aisle there are racks of clothes on display. There is only one of each item on the racks. You look through the t-shirts and things and decide which one(s) you want to buy.

On either side of the racks are huge walls with the items for sale. They are packaged in plastic canisters (like what tennis balls come in.) So you match the numbers on the tag of the diplay items to the numbers on the wall. Then you just choose your size and grab the cannister that matches. As you do this another cannister slides into the empty place.

There are hand baskets like you use in supermarkets for you to carry your selections in.

It was definitely different but I think that it was really clever. They can carry a huge variety of items, have minimal display space, and not have to worry about folding handled clothes all the time.

Here is the website for the store:
http://ut.uniqlo.com/utmag/open

The site is all in Japanese but you can see some pictures.

When I first came to Japan I was sure that I would only stay here for a year. I thought it would be a brief adventure. I guess at that time I was really stuck. I was at a job that wasn't my dream. I was always broke. I was in this limbo zone between being a "student" and a "professional" and I just wasn't sure what I wanted to do. Japan sounded like fun.

I was totally unprepared. I didn't speak any Japanese. I knew very little about ASIA much less Japan. I wasn't even sure where I would be living or what my job would be like. Since then it has just been one suprise after another. There have been a lot of times where I felt so confused and overwhelmed that I would just cry. But it was like a baptism by fire.

I came to this place where so many things are different from what I am used to. I really had to figure out where I fit in. I learned so much about myself and my abilities. I had to be flexible in so many ways. I had to eat food that was weird, learn social customs that seemed silly, get lost about a million times, and just figure out how to get by and get around in a place where I don't understand about 80% of what is going on around me. Its like being confused and figuring things out as I went along became my day-to-day lifestyle. ha ha.

So, now I am looking back at patterns. It seems to me like I really like change. I like to try new things and its not hard for me to say goodbye when I start getting bored. However, I also realize that this constant change can mean that I never "master" something. Career-wise I have never stuck around long enough at a job to consider moving up the ladder.

So maybe my next "change" can be to try and do that.

The preschool lead teacher at my school is getting married next month and she will be switching to part-time. Our director has mentioned how she would prefer to have a current employee move into the position rather than hire someone from outside. So, after thinking about it, I told her that I might be interested in the job. We all talked about it at the last staff meeting and everyone was really supportive of the idea. I felt so relieved. I was really worried that they might think I am totally unqualified and tell me to forget the idea. But instead they were so supportive and I am really thinking that I will go for it.

The job is different from what I am doing now. Right now I am a regular teacher for the 1-3 year olds. The position is for a lead teacher for the 3-5 year olds. Most obviously the kids are older. duh. But the lead teacher has so much more responsibility. It is a lot to organize and oversee. Not to mention that I would be accountable for everything to the parents. eeek! And...I still don't speak Japanese.

And here is the super scary stuff. The next term starts at the beginning of April. At that time a lot of kids from my current class will be moving up to preschool. The class size will be the biggest it has EVER been. The director is talking about rethinking so much of our routine. She is wondering if we need to order more furniture to accomodate the huge number of kids we will be having. In our nap room there are only 6 cribs. About 15 students will need to take naps. ha ha.

So if I decide to go for it, it will be a lot of work. Its nothing that I can't handle but, sheesh, it will be a lot of overtime for atleast the first few months.

And...if I take the position, I need to make a commitment to sticking to it for a full school year. So that would mean, I am staying until April 2009 atleast...in Japan.

I think that it is a big decision that I shouldn't take lightly. I want to think about it from every angle before I decide.

thoughts?